I have just come home, from back home. And that’s where one could think the dilemma starts. Indeed, it is strange to have two homes. From what should have only been the popular “year-abroad” experience after passing my A-levels, I, well, stayed around a little bit and so England has gained quite a stable place in my home-draw. Having lived here for nearly 3 years it has done a good job in convincing me that it deserves this honour. But would it not be easier to have just one place called “home” to focus on? I don’t think so.
Being away from my home country has taught me quite a few things and a German film (Yes, we do make films. They are actually awesome. Sounds crazy, but it’s true.) has made clear to me what’s going wrong in our heads most of the time. Why are we moaning our way through the news every day? We could just not watch them. The answer to this phenomenon is the little man that sits in the back of our minds. He constantly says: “No, that’s not enough.” He will not stop until you believe that everything that happens around you is not good enough and he likes being fed with all those bad bad news about the country we live in. He used to live in the back of my mind, too, and I would, just like my fellow-students at high school, go on about how bad everything is in Germany. Politicians didn’t have a clue, for a good holiday you could only possibly go abroad and the school system, I better not put down what we thought of that one. Germany seemed to me exactly what probably many not-Germans think of it to be like – an old-fashioned and grey place that had not got a lot to offer but the biggest piss-up of the year. Efficient maybe, but boring. I wanted to see what England was like with its great music and people who apparently had the same sense of humour as me (or maybe just laughed AT me, who knows.). And it lived up to expectations. That’s why ,still, I am here. I truly do love you, island.
But it has also taught me a much more important thing: Germany is just great and it is my home more now than it has ever been. As soon as the little never-satisfied-man packed its bags and took off, it was clear to me. I could finally see why people would go to Germany for a holiday and apparently even had a great time. We are not boring at all. We have great music actually, films, culture, art and Brits, I hate to say it but our public transport is just a different league compared to yours. I miss the language, German comedy (if you would speak the language, you would even find it funny!) and you just do get the best kebaps in the only country that probably has more kebap shops than Turkey.
So I am glad that I have moved to England, because it made me realise that I have also got a great home in Germany and that it is so much more amazing than I could have ever known if I hadn’t moved here. The never-satisfied-man will hopefully not come back as it is so much less stressful to try and see the positive sides about my home. I don’t know if or when I will go back but it’s nice to know that Germany will be there, waiting with all the great things it has to offer. I miss you Deutschland!